How to make people say yes to what you want

How to make people say yes to what you want


5/9/20247 min read

A group of friends at a coffee shop
A group of friends at a coffee shop


Learn to speak in a "persuasive tone," and you will be able to make people say yes to what you want.

It may seem strange, but it's true.

Suppose you watch the opening of any TED talk (Be sure to have the subtitles on). In that case, you'll notice that speakers are using very specific language and tone when outlining their ideas. This is the language that makes people say Yes.

We spend hours reading about persuasion in books and articles, but few of us actually speak in a persuasive tone... Why?

Perhaps because we need to be made aware of what our voice sounds like or its benefits... Or maybe we're just not capable or good enough at it! The truth is that many people can make us feel what they want us to feel while speaking with them... And this is how they get their way.

Relationships are hard, so don't expect them to be any easier at home than they are in the professional world.

Relationships are hard, so don't expect them to be any easier at home than they are in the professional world. In fact, it's even worse!

You might think that if you want something bad enough and work hard enough, your partner will eventually realize just how awesome of a person you really are and give in to your demands. But here's where things get tricky: while this may work on some people (and sometimes even with me), it only sometimes works out that way.

I've learned over time that relationships take a lot of time to develop properly and can often be rocky at first before settling into a comfortable groove where both parties feel supported by one another. So don't expect things to happen overnight; instead, ask yourself what kind of support system do I need for myself? The answer might surprise you!

You'll have to work at it if you want to get people to agree with you.

  • You'll have to be assertive, clear, and patient.

  • You'll also have to be flexible and open-minded, forgiving and understanding—and not just when it comes time for the important stuff (like getting the job done).

If you skip the small talk and get straight to what you need, your request will stand a greater chance of being agreed to.

Here are some tips for making sure that happens:

  • Be Clear About What You Want

  • Be Open-Minded and Flexible (If Possible)

  • Be Patient; Don't Get Angry or Tired out by Trying to Bargain with Someone Who Isn't Interested in Hearing Your Idea or Trying To Make A Decision For You...

You should always ask permission first. Otherwise, your request might sound too pushy or like a demand.

It's important to remember that you are not the only person in the world who wants what you want. You are also not the only person in the world who has a say in your life and how it goes. So when you make a request, be sure to ask for permission first—and then follow through with your plans, even if they may be met with resistance or disagreement.

Be flexible and open-minded when asking for something people might disagree with right away.

When asking for something, it's essential to be flexible and open-minded. You should be ready to compromise on what you want if necessary because no one will ever agree with everything at once. If someone says no or doesn't give their full support initially, don't take it personally—it might just mean that they're not 100% sure about the idea yet!

If there are any objections or concerns about your request, let them come up before getting too far into things; then try again with a better approach or different wording for your question (see below).

Make a plan early on what you should do if they say no — this will help you be less disappointed and more forgiving if they decide later on that they want to do it after all.

If they say no, ask them to explain their reasons. This will help you understand what is behind their decision, and it will also give you an opportunity to be more specific in your next request.

If they say yes, then it's time for action! Don't be disappointed if someone says no; instead, try again later, or even better yet — make plans for how the project can be done together!

Speak up for yourself and listen carefully so that others can learn from your mistakes.

  • Speak up for yourself and listen carefully so that others can learn from your mistakes.

  • Be honest, clear, and patient when communicating with others.

  • Be open to learning from others who have different experiences than you do or who may not share your point of view on every issue.

  • Be willing to change your mind when it's time; this is part of being human! And don't be afraid of compromise either—if something doesn't work out exactly as planned, then don't fight against it just because it feels like there should be a perfect solution (even if no one else agrees).

  • Listen carefully before speaking up or making decisions; this will help ensure that what comes out of your mouth isn't only true but also respectful toward those around you at all times throughout conversations!

Asking can be hard, but it's important that everyone feel heard.

Asking can be hard, but it's important that everyone feel heard. Be respectful and clear. Be honest and patient. Be firm but friendly simultaneously—you don't want to come off as rude or mean in any way!

You also need to make sure your request is flexible enough for people to have an open mind about it: if you're asking them (or even suggesting it) something that might be too restrictive or difficult for them, then maybe reconsider whether this is really what you want after all. And remember: sometimes what appears on paper isn't how things will turn out in reality;

sometimes things need changing so everyone involved feels more comfortable with their own ideas instead of being forced into submission by one person's demands alone!

Be clear about what you want.

Once you've decided what you want, it's important to be clear about the consequences of getting it and not getting it. If, for example, your goal is to become a better writer and increase your income by writing more books (which is what I did), then being clear on that goal makes all the difference.

  • How will this help me?

  • What will happen if I don't achieve this goal?

  • What would happen if I achieved this goal?

Acknowledge that others' opinions count.

The person who says "I'm right" and refuses to acknowledge the validity of another's opinion is not a collaborator or a team player. It doesn't matter if you agree or disagree with someone else; what matters is that you are working together as a team and making decisions based on their input.

The best way to get people on board with your ideas is by acknowledging their valid points so they can feel heard and respected in your decision-making process.

Learn to listen as well as talk.

The key to making people say yes is learning how to listen as well as talk. When speaking with someone, it's easy to get caught up in your thoughts and lose track of what they are saying. This can lead them to feel like they are talking too long or that their ideas need to be appreciated or understood by you.

Asking questions will help keep the conversation moving forward and allow both participants in the discussion room time for input from each other. You should also avoid interrupting them with statements such as "I think" or "What do you think?" Instead, ask open-ended questions such as "How did this make sense?" or "Could we try again?"

Accept that people do not always get it right away.

  • Accept that people do not always get it right away.

  • Accept that people are not always happy.

  • Accept that people are not always motivated to do what you want or need, but they will accept it when you ask nicely and show them how much it means to you.

Accept that everyone has their own priorities and will prioritize different things.

If you want to work with someone, it's not about what they can do for you but what THEY need from YOU.

People will always prioritize things differently than how we think they should be prioritized. That doesn't make them wrong or bad people—it just means that our way of thinking is flawed and needs updating!

Reward those who are close.

This can be a simple reward for something as simple as helping you with your homework or even just being there. It doesn't have to be anything big or extravagant, but it should be something that the person will want and enjoy. The reward can also serve as an incentive for them to continue being helpful by offering another reward later on down the road.

This method is effective because it gives people something they want while making them feel good about themselves at the same time!

Get your needs met early on.

  • Get your needs met early on.

  • Be clear about what you want. Don't just say, "I want to go out on Friday night!" instead, say something like, "I would love to go out with you this Friday night because I know we can have such an amazing time together and that it will be fun for us both."

  • Be patient and understanding when someone says no (and vice versa). Don't take it personally – everyone has their own reasons for saying yes or no, so don't take it personally if someone says no at first! Try not to be too pushy about getting people into things either...even though sometimes it feels like we need an excuse every second of our lives so as not to look like liars when asking someone else out on a date ourselves...we all do this from time to time ;) But remember: there's always another option besides asking directly. If something doesn't feel right, maybe try again next week?"

You can get what you want by being clear and understanding the people around you.

  • Be clear about your needs. Say so if someone asks for something from you that cannot be done. It's better to do this than let them think it will happen when it won't (or even worse, let them think that they have succeeded in getting what they wanted).

  • Be clear about your wants. You may only sometimes realize how much something means after the fact. Still, if your friend asks for help with her project, but she doesn't explain exactly why or how she needs help with it—letting them assume things—that could lead others down a less productive path than yours! This also applies when dealing with other people as well: If they ask for assistance of any kind without first clarifying their request (e.g., "Do me a favor?"), then ask questions like "Why would I do this?" or "What would make me happy?" before agreeing."


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